In the last week, I started noticing the nails on my right hand were slowly but progressively unsticking from the nail bed. Nothing dramatic was happening, and my nails didn’t feel soft or brittle, but this was getting painful and made me wonder if I should brace myself for my nails falling off. After everything I have been through over the years, this did not seem over the top or paranoid, but I was obviously coming at it from a firm place of “oh heeeeeell no” and hoping it wouldn’t be something I’d have to deal with. Given the fact that I am on many antibiotics, I am also always on the look out for potential issues brought on by that, notwithstanding giving my body all the support that I can (daily varied probiotics and probiotic foods, real food diet, supplements, rest and relaxation, etc.).
Jan and I started devising theories to make sense of it, knowing that nails are dead and can be a way for the body to rid itself of impurities, so we hypothesized that this was just part of the shedding of all the byproducts of pathogens and/or toxicity in my body. This is probably not entirely false, probably not entirely true, but I don’t think it was such a bad hypothesis at all (albeit extremely reductive).
First a side note: when I say that this “robs me of the very things I hold dear”, this is meant figuratively. I only mean that it robs me of the optimistic, peaceful, positive and loving disposition that I have. Given the poor state of my affairs, however, that’s pretty much all that I’ve got, and all that I have control over.
As I mention, last night I upped my Doxycycline dose to 300 mg. This is my third attempt at getting up higher than 200 mg, as both the first and second experiments ended abruptly after 3 days, after reaching an unbearable level of anxiety.